Backinleash

A few weeks ago I dreamt that my father chased me around sparse islands, holding a knife asking me to do something. I I just realized too that I've never taken the initiative to visit my grandparents on my own. The nearest I have been around their neighbourhood voluntarily was to visit my childhood doctor at the clinic beside the lottery stall, to get MC, my desperate tickets out of college routine. I have also come to terms with the fact that christians can sometimes come across as scary. Two of my family members have been out of the house for two weeks, sometimes the house is so empty I feel stressed. I have also developed this amazing sense of independence that came out of nowhere; I can sit alone and eat in a crowded foodcourt now, peak hour, sometimes (on braver days) without checking my phone every 10 minutes. I only buy earth-coloured clothes. I have decided that being happy isnt enough. I have yet to discover the truth in how happiness is a choice, not a kind of qouta you have to meet everyday. Its different you know. It helps put alot of things into perspective.